Another month, another pile of new metal albums to make your eardrums bleed: doomy ones to get you depressed if you're not too busy scaling Valhalla (Earthen Grave, Goatess); folksy ones to dance a drunken jig to in the backwoods (Finntroll); punky ones to chug cheap beer to and/or fight the powers that be (Fidlar, Retox); sleepy ones to play in really scary elevators (Deafheaven, Palms); stoney ones to blow your mind like an erupting volcano (Miss Lava); sludgy ones for those special days when you're wondering how humid southeast Georgia feels this time of year (Kylesa, Black Tusk); ones from horny musicians that might murder you if you hijack their spaceship (Huntress); ones from violent musicians that want to kick your lights in because the planet's going down the drain or in the name of religion or just for the stupid heck of it (Chimaira, Red, Five Finger Death Punch); even one that wishes it were an Eastern European jazz record (Serj Tankian). Lock and load, dude -- but make sure the safety's on! Don't want you to lose a foot.
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