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Cheat Sheet

Eternal Summer: The Hottest Heavy-Metal Album Covers of All Time

by Chuck Eddy

Eternal Summer: The Hottest Heavy-Metal Album Covers of All Time

Albums

Heavy metal may well be the Viking soundtrack to an endless tundra of ice and snow and darkness, but the genre's also obviously always been obsessed with interminable conflagration amid Dante's nine steamin'-hot circles of Hell. Seriously: if you want a really excellent suntan all year 'round, metal's where to go. Google "kneecap burning sensation," as this writer did recently, and the No. 3 possible cause (right behind "patellar bursitis" and "peripheral neuropathy") is "heavy metal exposure" true fact! So in honor of metal's "Eternal Summer" (as apparent Beach Boys fans Celtic Frost humorously put it in a song title on 1985's To Mega Therion, which bore impossibly evil-looking H.R. Giger cover art depicting Jesus in Satan's slingshot), we decided to take the temperatures of some of metal's most Hades-blazing album covers. Time to fire up the grill, slap on some Coppertone and stretch out on a lounge chair. It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes. Or, as Beavis would put it, "Fire! Fire! Fire!"